To: <trygve@trygve.com> Sent: Saturday, November 19, 2005 11:15 PM Subject: About Carmen... > Hey, > I'm a friend of Carmens, she probably talked about me, and I probably should just not get involved, but I'm trying to help. First, please don't tell her that I wrote you this, she would probably get upset with me. I know your whole situation (thanks to number of forwards and Carmen asking for advice etc). Anyway my point is I understand where you are coming from and I understand where she is coming from (I have been on both sides of similar situations myself). > What worries me here is that even though I tried to tell Carmen to  move on and let go number of times she is still thinking you will love her or that you already do and that you are meant to be together (she is even still thinking of getting a ticket and going over to your place). In the meantime she's not getting out of bed, not taking care of her kid, not looking for a job, she is just waiting for your emails. If you really are sure that you don't love her and care about helping her, write her an email saying that she should move on clearly. Leave no room for hope. Also say that at this point it's best if you don't correspond anymore. You won't be a bad guy, you would be doing her a favor. After that just cut off all contact with her. > I know it sounds cruel, but it will help her move on with her life and will be good for her in the long run.

To: <trygve@trygve.com> Sent: Saturday, April 08, 2006 12:14 AM Subject: Carmen F. > Sir: > You do not know me. I am an online friend of Carmen F's. > Perhaps you think you are being a "nice guy" by continuing to correspond with her, despite massive overwhelming evidence to the contrary. As you well know, you are dealing with a person who has lost her job due to ongoing psychiatric problems, problems for which she evidently requires further treatment. > As you can tell, she continues to believe she is in love with you and hangs on your every word. Instead of taking the mature route and cutting off contact with her, you have decided, instead, to keep throwing gasoline on this fire. Perhaps receiving such passionate unrequited romantic attention is a new experience for you and you are reveling in having a correspondent who bolsters your self-esteem so consistently. > Carmen needs to get therapy, return to work and provide guidance for her son. Ultimately, her failure to do so is hers. Nevertheless, you are choosing to provide fuel for her obsessive behaviour, allowing her to spend her time thinking about and corresponding with you instead of dealing with the real issues in her life and that of her son. I would be grateful if you would assist in getting her back on track instead of enabling this neglectful, self-indulgent behaviour.